Given the harrowing personal circumstances he has had to confront since the death of his mother last month, there can be few people more able than Frank Lampard to put the heartbreak of a penalty shoot-out defeat in the final of the Champions League into perspective.

The England midfield player’s words may provide little immediate comfort to John Terry, who missed a penalty that would have won the trophy for Chelsea, or Avram Grant, the first-team coach who may lose his job as a result, but there can be no doubting the wisdom of his claim that, in the grand scheme of things, such setbacks do not really matter.

“I feel very emotionally drained,” Lampard said last night. “It’s been very tough. I was trying to prepare for the biggest game of my life, but it’s become almost not that important. I’m just disappointed for my team-mates, who have been fantastic for me throughout these times. I wanted to be a part of them winning the Champions League, but it’s not to be.”

Lampard did not play as if his night’s work was unimportant, at times in the first half driving his team on almost single-handed. The 29-year-old created the chance with which Michael Ballack brought a smart save from Edwin van der Sar, equalised with an opportunistic finish and hit the bar with an exquisite chip before scoring in the shoot-out.

Lampard’s claims that Chelsea dominated the match should be taken with a whole heap of salt, with Uefa statistics showing Manchester United to have had 58 per cent of possession, although Chelsea grew stronger as the second half progressed and looked the only team capable of winning during extra time. “The manager spoke at half-time and everyone spoke,” Lampard said. “We were frustrated because we got this far and were sloppy in the first half-hour. Once we started to pass the ball we started to dominate. I felt comfortable and I thought if anyone was going to score it would be us.

“I think we dominated the game. Credit to Man United. They took control in the first half and maybe could have gone more than one up, but once we woke up and started playing, I don’t know how many shots we had. We hit the bar and the post and we were in the driving seat on the penalties until John missed. It’s cruel, but we know that’s football.”

Grant said that Chelsea would return to this stage after reaching the first Champions League final in their history, although he does not know if he will be at the helm. The Israeli refused to answer questions regarding his future, which could become clearer today, although he accepted that it could take a long time for players less philosophical than Lampard to recover from this setback.

“My future is the last thing I’m thinking about now,” Grant said. “Not now. Now I’m going to the hotel. I don’t know what I’ll do tomorrow. It will take a long time to recover now. One penalty can make the difference between happiness to some. I cannot tell you that I’m happy now and I don’t think I will be for the next days. But I’m more than proud of what we did and in the way we did it.

“I told the players that I’m proud of them. They’ve worked hard all year, even when some situations were not so easy. They played the final as the better team except in the first 30 minutes.

“Now we need to continue. It’s not the last time you will see Chelsea in the final. You will see us back and we will win the final.”