Hi Jane, I am planning a honeymoon in Italy for the first two weeks in July,
2008. We will have with us our 7.5 month baby. Are there any suggestions you
could give us for properties that include approved nannies or baby-sitting,
so that we could spend some days or evenings on our own?
Alternatively, my mother has suggested that she comes too … before the groom
gasps with horror as this is our honeymoon – she has suggested that she have
a granny flat or perhaps stays a mile or so away from us – so that she can
baby-sit any time we need – but stay out of our way when not needed. We’d
need a hire car to share between us for shuttling. Our budget is around
£2,500 for the travel and accommodation. Thanks. Anita Macdonald via
e-mail
Times online family travel expert Jane Owen replies:
Italians adore babies. What's more, babies and children are welcome everywhere
at all times of day and night. If you take your baby out with you, you'll
make instant friends and have instant babysitters in the shape of waiters
and waitresses who'll keep the baby happy while you eat.
On the other hand, if you want your honeymoon to revolve around rumpled
sheets, romantic walks,elegant drinks and a bit of clubbing why take the
baby?
It is possible to arrange baby sitting at places like Club
Med but they aren't always the most romantic places to be. And plenty of
Italian hotels will arrange baby sitting but, either way, how will you feel
about leaving your baby with people you don't know even if they have
references and qualifications?
Then there's the cost of baby-sitting - some swanky hotels charge up to 50
Euros an hour. Your mother's kind and generous offer is one solution but
will you really feel OK about leaving your mother and baby alone while you
go off and have fun? And, in all honesty, will your husband be so thrilled
to have his mother in law along?
Also, costs
rocket with four rather than two of you. Some have deals for modest
apartments or hotels which include cars but, for a couple of weeks you're
still looking at nearly £1,500 for four of you - and that's before you've
paid for flights, food and outings.
Finally - how are you going to feel with a new baby? I think it's very
difficult to imagine until the baby arrives and, if I were you, I'd leave
final booking until after the birth. That's certainly what I did.
When Rose, my first baby, was six months, I went to France for a five-day spa
break. The spa catered for babies and, in the evenings, I'd walk to the
local town, with Rose in a pram, for dinner. The mile or so walk gave us a
chance tio 'talk' to each other and, in the restaurant, Rose became a great
icebreaker - waiters and fellow diners came over to have a look at her and
talk to me.
The truth is I would not have wanted to leave her for a moment at that stage -
and I certainly wouldn't have enjoyed a honeymoon with her. You may or may
not feel the same but, what worries me about your plan, is that you seem to
be trying to please everyone - your husband, baby and mother - with the
result that you will probably please no one, least of all yourself.
Got a question about family travel? Email our trio of experts at yoursay@timesonline.co.uk- Chloe Bryan-Brown takes care of questions for the 0-6 year olds, Emma
Mahony handles the 7-12 age group and Jane Owen the teenage and single
mother groups
This is truly terrible advice. The question wasn't about you, Jane. It was about Anita. And all she wanted was some help finding a babysitter not an extended treatise on how it really would be much better if she took Baby along too.
Anita, totally ignore the above, and have a look at parentsneedpampering.com. There's lots of accommodation+babysitting solutions for Italy at far less than the "50 euros an hour" the scaremongerer suggests and the hotels in Puglia etc are far more romantic than Club Med. Hope you have a lovely time. And don't let anyone make you feel guilty. Best H.
sarah, london,
why not get married and go now? solves most of your problems.
Catherine, Exeter,