What could be more delightful than a pot of afternoon tea at Brown’s Hotel, that most traditional of Mayfair establishments? But lo, what is this on the room-service tray? A pot of dry tea leaves — and a jug of hot water. I encountered this “brew-your-own” tea nonsense recently in another five-star hotel. If I want unbrewed, tea-flavoured, warm water I’ll go to France. Stop it!

Otherwise, Brown’s has much to commend it. The hotel has a proud history (Alexander Graham Bell made the world’s first phone call here in 1876), and was recently acquired by the boutique group Rocco Forte Hotels, reopening after a £24 million makeover late last year. It was refurbished by Rocco’s sister, the hotelier Olga Polizzi, who knows what she’s doing. My bathroom, for example, was very well designed and lit.

On arrival, I was upgraded to a junior suite (had my cover been blown?) and the enormous bedroom, with hallway and dressing room, was cool and contemporary: pistachio-hued walls, two grey felt- covered daybeds, a large plasma-screen TV and a Bose docking station so I could plug in my iPod, which I loved. But I found the lighting difficult to understand, despite tuition from the staff. Oh, for a simple master switch by the bed.

Downstairs, we started with a drink in the smart Donovan Bar (photographer Terence Donovan’s prints adorn it), which was full of elegantly dressed thirty and fortysomethings enjoying cocktails. Across the hallway in the wood-panelled Grill, we stepped back a century. Jacketed diners, most from an older age group, got to grips with a classic English menu of roasts, served by a squadron of smart waiters (we counted seven at our table alone).

Dinner was excellent, despite an over-long pause between courses. We chose dressed Dorset king crab and eggs Benedict, then roast grouse and calf’s liver and bacon. Delicious cheeses were served from a marble-topped trolley. With a £30 bottle of wine — one of the most modest — our meal came to £160.

Brown’s has great staff: all were helpful without being obsequious or annoying. But at these prices, they should be. The cheapest room is £346 and when I booked, the cheapest available cost £517, though I was told that this was a special deal on a room that normally costs more. The suite to which I was upgraded costs £899. So they could perhaps afford a few tea-making lessons.

Bottom line: Cath Urquhart paid £717.50 for dinner for two, bed & breakfast.

What we think: A “treat” hotel, ideal for special occasions.

Best thing: Excellent food and service.

Worst thing: The tea.

Need to know: Brown’s Hotel (020-7493 6020, www.roccofortehotels.com), Albemarle Street, London W1.

Access all areas: Two bedrooms, and the public areas, have wheelchair access.

Food: 8 out of 10 (but two for the tea).

Room: 7 out of 10.

Service: 8 out of 10.

Value for money: 6 out of 10.

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