If there's one thing guaranteed to put you off staying in a hotel it's other
people. The solution? Bin them.
Go for a hotel where, if you and your beloved aren't the only guests, then at
least there are only a handful of others. You may, though, find that
escaping far from the madding crowd means ending up in some unusual
locations.
UP, UP AND AWAY
Harlingen Harbour Crane, Netherlands
As far as weird places to stay goes, just two of you, 17m (56ft) above the
ground in a fully functioning harbourside crane in Holland is right up
there. Literally. Thankfully the original ladders have been replaced by
lifts, and in the cabin there's a double bed, chair, shower and minibar. And
when you want to be master of your own sightseeing, push the lever and swing
her round 360 degrees for a view with a room.
Details: www.vuurtoren-harlingen.nl,
B&B for two from £245.
FLOAT ON
Utter Inn, Vasteras, Sweden
Tethered out in the middle of Lake Malaren near the town of Vasteras (which
Ryanair passes off as Stockholm, although it's some 90km away) this small
floating garden-shed lookalike accommodates two people.
Underwater windows allow you to eyeball passing fish. It's the brainchild of
Mikael Genberg, a local artist who has also created a treehouse hotel near
by, the Woodpecker. Evening meals are delivered by boat, along with a lovely
picnic breakfast for the morning.
Details: 00 46 21 39 01 00, www.vasterasmalarstaden.se.
From £190 for two including breakfast.
PEACE IN A POD
Hotel Everland, Paris
You won't get a better view of Paris than from this pod perched atop the roof
of the Palais de Tokyo near the Seine, although getting a booking at Paris's
most unique des-res is another matter. The one-bedroom hotel, which you can
stay in for only a night at a time, has a bathroom, double bed and living
room.
Details: www.everland.ch, from £256 for
two.
TUBULAR BELLES
Park Hotel, Linz, Austria
Feel as if your life's going down the drain? Celebrate the fact by staying in
one. Open from May, the several large, minimalist drainpipe rooms, located
in the Austrian city of Linz, are on the banks of the river Danube. As it's
in a park, you use the municipal showers and lavatories but that does keep
costs down. In fact, the hotel owners operate a “pay what you think it's
worth” policy.
Details: www.dasparkhotel.net
DEEP SLEEP
Jules' Undersea Lodge, Key Largo, Florida
To get to this two-room lodge, you have first to don scuba gear and dive 6.5m
beneath the briny. Non-divers can stay after a short lesson and you can even
get married there. In the living area there's a TV and DVD player should
staring competitions with angel fish on the other side of the 1m panoramic
windows prove tiresome. Not one, really, for the claustrophobic.
Details: 001 305 451 2353, www.jul.com.
Doubles from £375 including dinner.
SPLENDID ISOLATION
Rua Reidh Lighthouse, Gairloch, Scotland
If you want to stay in Britain but get as far away from most people as
possible, the northwest of Scotland is your best bet. This lighthouse, built
in 1910 on a peninsula near Gairloch, will garner extra hermit points for
you. You can book one of the nine rooms but for extra isolation hire out the
whole place (minimum stay is two nights). There is beautiful mountain and
coastal scenery but should the Scottish weather turn soggy, the lighthouse
has its own drying room.
Details: 01445 771 263, www.ruareidh.co.uk.
Room-only doubles from £32. To rent the whole lighthouse is from £600 for
two nights.
