Stephen Bleach
We've made some changes
to The Sunday Times

Come on everybody, sing along: “Oh, DECK the halls with boughs of holly, fa-la-la-la-la, la-la, la...”
Now don’t be like that. We know it’s August, we know ’tis the season to be sunbathing topless in the back garden, but we’re trying to help you here. Because, believe it or not, the best Christmas breaks are already being nabbed. Now. By organised people. Swish hotels that are putting on their own seasonal bashes report a steady flow of bookings, with some getting ready to hang out the “no room at the inn” sign: they can be pricey, but having all the trimmings and no washing-up is a present in itself.
Or else there are cottages – but you don’t want just any cottage at that time of year. No, you want a snug, idyllic old place, all character, beams, flagstone floors and open fires (chestnuts for the roasting of): the setting for a Christmas that’s more Dickens than Dixons, more tradition than Toys ’R’ Us. Trouble is, that’s what everyone else wants, too, so they’re being snaffled faster than mince pies at the office do.
All the breaks below were available at the time of going to press, but time and tinsel wait for no man, so get booking now.
Hotels
Combe House (01404 540400, www.thishotel.com ), a Grade I-listed Elizabethan manor on its own estate in Devon, is holding a seasonal bash for just 32 guests, with every trimming going. There’ll be a crackling fire in the great hall and mountains of food, including clotted-cream teas, the full-works dinner on the day and candlelit tea in the Georgian kitchen: plus a harpist, a magician, even a casino. It’s from £1,035pp for three nights from the 24th, including all meals and wine.
Still trad, but slightly trendier with it, Whatley Manor (01666 822888, www.whatleymanor.com ) in Wiltshire promises a champagne reception on Christmas Eve, followed by a sumptuous six-course lunch in its award-winning dining room on the 25th. Log fires, naturally, good walking country all around to work off the pounds, and – we like the sound of this – a stack of classic films in the 40-seater cinema. Prices for three nights from the 23rd start at £930pp, including meals.
In Hertfordshire, The Grove (01923 294210, www.thegrove.co.uk/christmas ) has families in mind, with a Santa’s workshop to visit, presents for all, lots of Crimbo activities in the kids’ club, and – oh, joy – Scalextric competitions (don’t get too competitive now, dads, it’s only a game). Plus mince pies, woodland walks in the 300-acre grounds, log fires, giant crackers, carol singers, and a loudly groaning board of victuals. Two nights from £855pp, three nights from £1,050pp, including breakfast, Christmas lunch and one dinner; children from £430.
Up in Cumbria, the Lakeside Hotel (015395 30001, www.lakesidehotel.co.uk ), in a fabulous spot on the shores of Windermere, is pushing the boat out for a five-night do. In between a succession of serious dinners there will be a two-hour cruise with jazz band, guided fell walks, parlour games, midnight Mass at Cartmel Priory (with hot broth on your return), dances, buffets, blackjack... or if it all gets a bit much, chill out in the spa. From £750pp, including most meals.
The festive package at the Bath Priory (01225 331922, www.thebathpriory.co.uk ) has more baubles on it than the whacking great tree they’ll have in the drawing room. Champagne, canapés, carol singers, log fires, you’d expect: but complimentary tickets and transport to Aladdin at the Theatre Royal? Horse and carriage rides with hot punch? Tickets to Bath’s excellent Thermae spa (plus a treatment in their own one) and a succession of blowout meals from a Michelin-starred restaurant? Beat that. For four nights from the 23rd, it’s from £1,100pp (kids from £285), including breakfast, dinner, Christmas lunch, teas and treats.
At Edinburgh’s stylish Bonham (0131 274 7400, www.townhousecompany.com ) the emphasis is on cuisine, with Michel Bouyer serving up an adventurous seven-course take on Christmas dinner that includes guinea fowl with Umbrian black-truffle sauce, blue stilton with port reduction, and Christmas pudding with Drambuie and salted caramel sauce. Two nights’ B&B from the 24th, with that dinner and an evening meal, costs from £255pp.
Cottages
Well, mostly cottages. But let’s start big: how about a castle. Boturich, by Loch Lomond, was built in 1832 with crenellations, turrets and towers – Sir Walter Scott came here to research Rob Roy. There’s a warren of rooms inside, 140 acres of woodland outside, snooker and games, and, in the kitchen, an Aga for the turkey. It’s all very grand, as it should be – it costs five of them. Still, that is for 16 people, for a week. Contact Scotts Castle Holidays (01208 821341, www.scottscastles.com ), which still has a good selection of seriously imposing properties available north of the border.
Steering the sleigh south, we come to... oops, another castle. Bear with us, though, this one’s a Christmas cracker. The Old Lodge is a beautifully restored 14th-century tower on the Raby Park Estate in Co Durham: a huge stone fireplace for Santa to drop into, forests of beams in the bedrooms, flagstone floors, and thick, thick walls to keep out the chill. Sleeping eight, it’s £2,088 for a week from the 21st with www.cottages4you.co.uk , which still has plenty of other great Christmas hideaways.
In the Cotswolds, the mellow yellow stones of 250-year-old Keytes Cottage contain a fine inglenook fireplace to warm your cockles, and there’s a cracking pub a stroll away. Sleeping four, it’s £769 for Christmas week, with Rural Retreats (01386 701177, www.ruralretreats.co.uk ), which has more than 400 characterful properties across the UK.
Enough country idylls. For a really Dickensian yule, try the East End of London. The Landmark Trust’s 18th-century Huguenot weaver’s house on Princelet Street in Spitalfields is suffused with the smoky ghosts of Christmas past. Lovingly restored, with original panels, timber floors and shuttered street windows, it sleeps six and costs £1,075 for the week from the 21st. Many of the Trust’s 180 notable historic buildings have been booked, but there are some good ones left (01628 825925, www. landmarktrust.org.uk ).
In fact, anywhere historic is in demand. All the National Trust’s properties sleeping eight or more have gone, but there are Christmas treats left at the smaller end of the range. Our favourite is in Kent. Ightham Mote is a superb, 14th-century moated manor house, a venerable latticework of aged timbers and wonky roof lines. In the grounds, Laundry Cottage is the genuine medieval article, wood-burning stove and all. It sleeps four and costs £1,274 for a week from the 20th (0870 458 4422, www.nationaltrustcottages.co.uk ).
Down in Somerset, the perfect place for a couply Christmas. The Lodge is a twee thatched place, built in 1836, on the edge of Goathurst: it’s stylish but small inside, so you’ll be rather on top of each other, but then that’s the idea. Snuggle by the log burner, soak in the rather decadent hot tub, and prove to each other that bad boys and girls get presents, too. It’s £1,275 from the 24th, with The Little Domain (www.thelittledomain.com ). Yes, ouch: but they’ve got plenty more in the same vein at less elevated prices.
Some tempting places left in Devon, too. The appropriately named Sweets in Croyde is pure chocolate-box stuff: stone walls, thatched roof, heavy oak doors, open grates and Rayburns in the inglenooks, it’s about as traditional as you get – it’s seen 300 Christmases already. Near the beach, too, for a Boxing Day cobweb-shredding walk. It sleeps 10 and costs £1,997 for the week from the 22nd, with local specialist Marsdens (01271 813777, www.marsdens.co.uk ).
At the end of a private lane up on Dartmoor, Burnville Farm is rather more secluded. It’s a proper farm, so you’ll have to live with a moo or two, but that’s more than made up for by the sheer character of the place: a big, solid, stone farmhouse with a colossal fire in the flagstoned dining room. It’ll sleep 10 at a squeeze, and costs £1,298 for the week from the 22nd. The agency, Helpful Holidays (01647 434063, www.helpfulholidays.com ), has a great range across the West Country, with decent availability.
English Heritage (0870 333 1187, www.english-heritage.org.uk/holidaycottages) says all its properties with open fires have gone, so no chestnut-roasting, but it does have a few spectacular consolation prizes. Best is the Custodian’s House, within the walls of Henry VIII’s satisfyingly chunky Pendennis Castle, Falmouth; cosy enough for a couple, it’s £805 for the week from the 21st.
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